It is very hard- in fact it’s the worst thing I’ve ever gone through as this situation strikes at the core of all my certainties as well as my hope for the future.
It’s also the loneliest I’ve ever felt, because one can’t go shouting out your hurt to all and sundry and in any case, I have my pride too. I certainly can’t keep talking to my husband, because it only serves to make him more self-righteous and smug. It also only makes him treat me more condescendingly as if he’s humouring me like a child; after all he’s done nothing wrong and I’ve kept accusing him of misdemeanours that are a figment of my imagination or a gross exaggeration at the very least (or so he says).
Thanks for your prayers, I’m extremely greatful that you’re thinking of me; I’m also greatful that the Lord has given me so much peace in my heart and has made me see what beauty and joy there still is in this life and how many kind and caring people there too.
I’m also greatful in that I’ve noticed the Lord working in my husband’s heart, I’ve seen him much more involved in reading the Bible these last few days.I sense the Holy Spirit is working in him and perhaps making him aware of how his actions have affected others and that pride and selfishness have no place in a Christian marriage.
At least that’s what I’m praying for, that he might become once again, the man I knew before.I feel all things work together for good, and God will use this experience to help us both grow spiritually and come out stronger at the other end.