Thursday, October 12, 2006
1. Forgiveness Versus Reconciliation
“We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God.”1
We know that we need to forgive all who have hurt or offended us, but
to be reconciled to them? Wherever possible this ought to be our goal,
it isn’t always possible as reconciliation is dependent on both
Primarily we need to be reconciled to God. We do this when we confess
sins to him and receive his forgiveness. However, for our own wellbeing
is imperative that we forgive any and all who have hurt us. This can be
extremely difficult if the one involved won’t even admit what s/he has
This, then, makes reconciliation impossible.
According to some folk we can’t forgive this type of person. If this is
some of us are going to carry grudges for a long time. In these
forgiveness is a choice. We can choose to forgive or we can cling to
hurt and anger and hurt ourselves.
To genuinely forgive we need to get rid of our hurt and anger by
these feelings, not necessarily to the one who hurt us, but to an
understanding person to rid ourselves of these bottled up destructive
emotions. Once we do this, forgiveness becomes possible even if there
never any reconciliation.
Keep in mind, too, that forgiveness doesn’t mean that we allow the
who hurt us to hurt us again. With these people we need to have healthy
boundaries to protect ourselves. Remember, too, that meekness is not
weakness. Lack of healthy boundaries is.
Suggested prayer: “Dear God, please help me to forgive all who have
and be reconciled to them wherever possible. But help me to forgive
regardless of the other person’s response. And may I always admit and
resolve my part in all conflicts and be reconciled to you. Thank you
hearing and answering my prayer. Gratefully, in Jesus’ name, amen.”
1. 2 Corinthians 5:20.
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