n case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
Some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box:
Fits one head.
On Tesco's Tiramisu desert:
Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.)
On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating
On packaging for a Rowenta Iron:
Do not iron clothes on body
On Boot's CHILDREN's Cough Medicine
Do not drive car or operate machinery
On Nytol (a sleep aid):
Warning: may cause drowsiness
On a kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
On Sainsbury's Peanuts
Warning: contains nuts
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
On a chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
