http://www.praize.com/forums/ en-us no-reply@praize.com Wed, 22 May 2013 22:14:00 GMT Gossamer Forum by Gossamer Threads, Inc. http://www.rssboard.org/rss-specification http://www.praize.com/forum/icons/gforum-logo.png http://www.praize.com/forums/ 50 50 http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/I'm_on_My_Way_to_Heaven!_P117382/?page=unread#117382 I had a thought this morning. I had walked a mile in beautiful Sedona, AZ. I intended to walk longer but was a little late getting started and felt it was too hot to go further. When I got on line, I read Praize member Roundtable's blog which can be found at: http://www.praize.com/...y_people_J27690.html and it started me thinking some rambling thoughts. My father died when I was four. We were members of the Methodist church. So I knew about "my father which art in heaven". I started praying to go to heaven to be with Daddy and I have never stopped. Seventy-one years later (and slightly wiser... although you may not think so if you read on) my prayer has never changeed. Only now I cry "when, Lord, when"? So I thought, this morning, what if I made a sign that said, "I'm on my way to Heaven" and started walking... (Of course I would have to wait a few months because of the temperatures here, like I said in the first paragraph.) I wonder which way I would head and how long it would take for the police to pick me up and institutionalize me! I just thought I would put this out there and get your thoughts and maybe put a smile on your face. What are YOU thinking about this morning? Blessings ~ Sarah 7ba195846db879dad5a7f0244c1f0e76 Jul 11, 2012, 8:38 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_Raising_teenagers_P2396/?page=unread#2396 I just read the best book on parenting that I have ever read. It is a Christian book based on biblical principles. It is unlike any other parenting book I have ever read. It is by Danny Silk "Loving Our Children on Purpose". It really helped me see that I am to teach my children like God parents us. We must teach them through making choices and managing their freedoms. We are not to teach them by controlling them and making all their decisions for them. What I have to say about it just does not give it justice. Danny Silk helps parents with troubled teens in CA to make a heart connection so that true parenting can happen through love. Amazing book! I highly recommend it to all parents! I hope this helps. cpstam 0 Jul 8, 2009, 7:07 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Great_way_to_memorize_the_23_Psalm_P15923/?page=unread#15923 http://www.associatedcont[...]23.html Our 5 year old daughter found a nifty way to remember the 23rd Psalm, she sings it to a simple song. Which is what a psalm is a song. So since I have recording gear at home, I set up a microphone one evening and let her rock out with the Holy Spirit. It's a handy melody to remember it with for both young and old. Enjoy God Bless p.s. If You would like a copy of this let me know I can email it to You. goldstartalent@yahoo.com http://www.associatedcontent.com/audio/2947/psalm_23.html 0 May 13, 2008, 8:26 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_When_does_a_Christian_parent_stop_parenting.._P15605/?page=unread#15605 To be honest, I don't think that Christian Parents should ever quit parenting, but before you jump to conclusions, let me explain, when we are born and as long as we are under our parents roof, they should be using christian parenting skills, but once we get out on our, then they will still be showing some parenting skills, they will offer suggestions, but Godly parents won't demand you follow their suggestions, they just plant those suggestions for your benefit, plus all of the parenting they have done while you were being raised, will have a deeper impact of your kids than you realize. I know, I know, sometimes parents can be overbearing, most of the time, it is out of love and they want you to learn from their mistakes, instead of letting you learn from your own mistakes. 0 Mar 25, 2008, 12:30 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_When_your_adult_children_no_longer_believe_P77783/?page=unread#77783 I totally agree with the posts here, especially Allen's. But I want to take it one step further. We must STAND on the Word. That means that we believe it no matter what the situation looks like. 29 years ago the Lord spoke to me in my sleep that my children would all be saved and with me in heaven. You know what? I am still waiting for that to happen. But I KNOW that I have what I say (which is another whole topic!). It is up to me to say what the Bible says, which is... Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Whenever a negative thought enters your head, quote this scripture. Do NOT allow negativity to direct you. You raised your children up in the faith as best you could. That is all that is required of you. Now just claim the Word. Don't give up! 0 Feb 24, 2008, 6:53 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_When_your_adult_children_no_longer_believe_P77782/?page=unread#77782 Thankyou for sharing this my friends. My household is the same and i identify with what each of you are saying. I also was one of those young people who wandered. My parents love and private prayers did way more than anything they couldve said to me at that time, words just made me more rebellious. I too have noticed that every once in awhile my children will come out with something that shows me they do remember what they have been taught. We must indeed hold on to the promise of train up a child in the that they should go... 0 Feb 23, 2008, 4:55 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_When_your_adult_children_no_longer_believe_P77781/?page=unread#77781 I really like what you shared, Allen, and yes you are so correct about THE totally perfect Parent!! Doing ministry, including within my own family, has shown me that God is ever faithful even til the end. There have been many a person who when they knew their day was coming where they would soon face Him that realization comes that all along they did indeed believe even though they never actually publically professed. It is sad for us that we feel time was so wasted in between, but you know, that is between them and God. The scripture quoted is so supportive. Thank you for sharing that principle. I too have heard quips from my children that were indeed grounded on what was talked even though not 'officially' relegated to the author. May all earthly parents take hope in this. 0 Feb 23, 2008, 11:55 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_When_your_adult_children_no_longer_believe_P77780/?page=unread#77780 You know our job as parents never really ends once our children are adults. We do the best we can, sometimes it is enough and sometimes not. What I do believe is that we can train and raise our children in a Christian household. We do the best we can with what we have been taught by our own parents, or what we have sought for our personal spiritual growth as we built our own lives in Christ. We can give them the tools and materials to ground them in Christ and His teachings. BUT in the end all we can do is lead and it is up to them to accept. There is many a child that accepted Christ at the ages you state only to become adults and stray. As parents most often they will not listen to us, feeling they're now adults and they can do what they want, and yes it is upsetting. However, rather than continue to push at times the best thing to do is continue praying and lead by continuing your own Christian example. I truly understand what you are feeling. Some of my children have gone the same way. I know they believe deep down and yet they travel their own way rather than look to Him first. It has made for difficult lives and experiences for them. As a parent that is heartbreaking to see especially when grandchildren are involved. I pray every day, since the day they were born, for God to have His way with them, and for them to walk in His path. I will continue to do so until the day I go home to Him. I have not been a perfect parent either. If you find one let me know May God continue to bless you, and may you find some peace in what you are seeing even when what you know they are about is not Godly. It is often by trials and tribulations our loved ones learn the true meaning of faith and God, and then He uses them to reach those that too have strayed. 0 Feb 23, 2008, 9:35 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/When_your_adult_children_no_longer_believe_P77779/?page=unread#77779 I thought I brought my two girls up in the right way. Church, the Lord, Jesus being their savior. I believed them when they told me they accepted Christ as their savior in the 6th and 7th grade. Now, I don't know. Neither one of them is a virgin, I am having a hard time dealing with that, and they both tell me they want nothing to do with God because he really isn't there for them. I feel I didn't do the job the Lord required me to do. I know I didn't, I watch other parents who did raise their kids the right way. I don't know what to do now. I know my girls are adults 21 and 18, but that doesn't mean I give up or do I? Sad 0 Feb 23, 2008, 8:45 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/When_does_a_Christian_parent_stop_parenting.._P15604/?page=unread#15604 My christian parents and I have an ongoing disagreement as to when a parent is no longer responsible for guiding/ instructing their adult child in christian ways. I know the Bible tells us to approach another believer who is in sin, and lovingly point out that sin (Romans 6:1-2, Colossians 3:1-9), not to judge (Matt. 7:15), and to point them in the right direction thru scripture (2 Timothy 4:2). Does anyone else have any other scripture references that will help me to convince my parents of my obligation to my children, as well as theirs? One of my children is a believer, the other is not. Thanks, J~ 0 Dec 19, 2007, 12:07 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Need_help_with_my_daughter_P75899/?page=unread#75899 My daughter is turning 20 next week. She lives in the Yukon with her boyfriend's family. My problem is that she plans on coming home at Christmas with her boyfriend. She thinks he should stay in her room and that a lock should be put on the door. She said that he could sleep on the floor. My husband and I have said no to both requests--no he can't sleep there and no to the lock on the door. Please pray for her; and any advice you have on this matter and how to handle it would be appreciated. Thank you. 0 Oct 12, 2007, 9:57 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_Raising_teenagers_P2395/?page=unread#2395 With a 19 yr old, 16 yr old and 14 yr old, I can only say we insist on following rules, consideration for others (esp. elders), doing chores and we reward with privileges: to spend time with friends, have friends over, play electronic games, play online "approved" games, spending time with us their parents. They have to go to church as long as they live under our roof, and they have to participate there...no bringing electronic hand held games to play, or ignoring what is happening during the service. We eat together, praying before meals, spend time together in the later evening hours. We take family trips to hike or be tourists on Sundays, praying together for safe travel as we leave town in our vehicle. They have too many activities, between school, jobs and daily get-togethers with their friends to give up the only times we have together as a family-meals and Sunday trips. We've always talked about why our rules are based on God's Word to us and the consequences God has for disobedience to Him or to parents. Reminding them now is often annoying for them to hear as they leave for various activities, but still necessary for them to be reminded of. Reminding them daily to pray to thank God for blessings they have or for help when they need it is also annoying for them most days but occasionally we get a thank you, I forgot I could depend on God if I only talked to Him. They have many experiences of how God has stepped in and protected them or us as a family, provided what was asked for or needed even when it wasn't taken to God in prayer and even they can see it is too much to be coincidental. If we hadn't had God as a focus from the beginning I'm not sure they would have those reflections to look back on to give them faith as teens. We still have challenging areas with them, esp. challenging days and that's probably the way it has always been and will always be, until they mature and are adults. Hope this has helped. 0 Aug 19, 2007, 3:06 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_New_Here_P72643/?page=unread#72643 Hi Amanda, Welcome to Praize! As a father, grandfather and great-grandfather, let me say that I clearly understand the difficulties of becoming a parent for the first time. So I hope you will forgive me if I "read between the lines" some from what you have put in your post. From the things you have shared, both here in this thread and in your profile, let me make some observations and some suggestions. The first thing I would like to point out to you is that you should never feel like a failure because you choose to stay at home and be a fulltime mother. Unfortunately in todays world there are far too many who equaite success in life with making money and gaining positions in life. Or as the saying or goes; "Gaining fame and fortune." Let me give you a defination of success that is far more correct than how the majority of the world difines success. Success is the progressive realization of any worthy ideal. Please note that I said the progressive realization of a worthy ideal. To explain. If you have chosen to stay at home and be a fulltime mother, wife, and homemaker, and you are learning daily how to become a better wife, mother, and homemaker, then you are just as successful as any one who has accomplished any other goal in life. Making money should never be the standard by which success is judged. I have pointed this out because from your post it would seem that either you or your husband, or both of you, feel that you should be contributing more to the family financially. Finances are often a very real source of dissagreement with couples. Wheither it be money that you argue about or somthing else, the first thing to remember is that it takes two people to argue. The natural reaction for any of us when someone says somthing that we don't agree with, or that we feel is a personal attack, is to respond in defense of our position. If however, instead of replying to the other persons unwelcomed remarks with answers or statements that are an attempt to justify our own position, we should try asking questions. For example; Why are you so unhappy with me? What has made you feel that way? How do you think the problem might be solved? I say ask questions because when you ask a qurestion the other person has to stop and think about what they have said and come up with an answer for the question you have ask. By allowing the other person to think about what they have said, and giving them the time to respond to your question, what they have said may very well start to sound foolish even to them, or they may actually explain their reasoning without becoming more hostile. Questions that start with; why?, how?, what? or something like, would you please explain?, all require time and thought to respond to. While the explaination is being given it allows a little time for each to cool down. Somthing I notced in your profile is that you said that you are deaf. That brings up the question; Is your husband also deaf? If he is not, does he unnderstand deafness and how it affects you? He must have a correct understanding of deafness if he is to understand how it affects you and your child. You also did not indicate wheather you use sign or not. I mention this because if you do, or if you have difficulty hearing the baby cry or talk, you should start as soon as possible to teach your daughter sign. Children can be taught sign much earlier than most children can talk. The "Baby Einstine" series of childrens teaching videos has an excellent program available which can be started as soon as the child starts to notice things around them. I can recommend it from personal experiemce because my wife has a cousin that has taught her child sign, using this progran, before the age of 18 months. There are many items available to help a deaf parent to not only care for their children, but also to help with day to day chores. I might also suggest that you go to the Women's Issues Forun here at Praize and read the thread titled "Getting Help From Husbands." As for relationship counseling the first thing I would suggest, in addition that the counselor be a qualified health care professional, is that you should look for a Christian counselor. Also there are very good parenting classes availeable for the deaf in most areas of the U.S. Please feel free to contact me at any time if you have questions or need help in finding reasources. You may contact me directly at: thecountrydoc1@yahoo.com Your friend and brother in Christ, Doc 0 Apr 20, 2007, 3:27 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_New_Here_P72641/?page=unread#72641 Hi from one new stay at home mom to another my daughter is one years old so im still a pretty new momma. When my daughter was first born I thought I had to do everything but you know what, I learned that they grow up quick and if your busy cleaning or other things around the house youll miss them growing up. So now what I do is I clean and take care of the house when my daughter is taking her naps and that way when shes awake I can put my focus and time on her. 0 Feb 14, 2007, 3:35 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_New_Here_P72640/?page=unread#72640 Welcome to you from central Wisconsin! We're happy to have you as a member of Praize.com, the fastest growing Christian website on the internet, aside from Xianx.com. To help you learn all about what Praize has to offer I suggest that you take the tour that we have located at: http://www.praize.com/tour/ We have so many ways to meet others here through the clubs, forums, chat and instant messenger. I hope to see you around this awesome community. You may even find some parenting clubs that will help you in what you are feeling being a stay at home mom. Know that if you are financially able to do so and it works for you, it is a wonderful gift you are able to give to your child. But I also know that it isn't for everyone. I pray that you find balance in your life for what fits the needs of your family. Our chat rooms are located at the below URL: http://www.praize.com/chat/ Here is our free instant messenger link: http://www.praize.com/IM/ If you ever need any assistance don't hesitate to ask me or any member, PraizeOP or at the Help Desk. God bless you and once again Welcome to Praize. 0 Jan 23, 2007, 5:47 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Raising_teenagers_P2394/?page=unread#2394 If you have some advice on how to raise Christian teenagers.I'm happy to know it Thanks. 0 Feb 18, 2006, 12:10 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_HELP!!_My_9yr_old_is_a_big_fat_liar!!_P43281/?page=unread#43281 I know a lot of parents who made their kids write Bible verses. Nearly all of the kids are now atheists. 0 Jan 26, 2006, 12:05 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_12_year_old_daughter%2C_need_I_say_more%3F_P12516/?page=unread#12516 Hello John, No John you do not need to say more! You are not alone when you indicate difficulty conversing with a nearteen. Eventhough I've had more than enough practice at it I still take a deep breath when the need arises to speak with anyone in this age range. You have been given some very good advice in the previous post. However your question has multipal parts that require consideration. I will list the most important things to consider and will make some comment on some of them. A book could be written on each subject so my comments will be confined to the most urgent. (1) Your relationship with your daughter. (2) Your daughters attitudes about your concerns. (3) Your attitude about your daughter.(on present topic) (4) Your daughters attitude toward her friends. (5) Your attitude toward your daughters friends. (6) Your daughters attitude toward being a Christian. (7) Your wifes attitude about Christianity in general. (8) Your attitude about your wifes not being a Christian. (9) Your wifes feelings about your daughter, being a Christian, and church related activities. (10)Your emotions must never outweigh your logic. You will notice that each topic has been started with the pronoun your . I have listed them this way because as a Christian father the responsability for the entire family starts with you. This is not ment to intimidate or frighten you but to put you where God has placed you. You are the head of the family. In light of this lets take a look at the practical aplications involved. Your relationship with your daughter(This has to be the starting point.): For any parent, be they father or mother, it is always hard to seperate authority, disipilinarian, friendship, and confidant, from being a concerned parent. You must let your daughter know that your love for her will never fail. She needs to have confidence that you are her best friend, and her proptecter. She must feel that you will never say or do anything that is not in her best interest and that she can tell you anthing without fear of loosing your respect and love. Once you are confident in this most important point then each additional point can be addressed by simple conversation. I used the term simple because it sounds simple. As in most conversations, no matter who they are with, the pronoun I should be used as seldom as possible and the pronoun you should be used as much as possible. How do you do that you ask? Simple! Ask questions! By asking questions you will accomplish two things. First, anyone you have conversation with, especialy your daughter, will feel that you respect their opinions and them as a person. Second, by giving thought to the questions before you ask them you will find out the best way to reach the desired objective. It is impossible to know how to proceed without knowing what is on her mind. NEVER PREACH AT anyone especialy your daughter. This same principal should be used with your wife in all matters but especially in those where your daughter is concerned. This approach may sound too simple but it is most effective. This is an approach used by the most powerful people in the world to gain their objectives wheather they be world deplomates, international traders, politicians, or thier personal relationships. As a father I'm sure that you consider your daughter to be more important than anything or anyone on earth. Treat her accordingly. Once you have applied these first steps you will be able to suggest things that you wish to instill in your daughter and her behavior. What I have presented here is a guidline. It is not intended to be a step by step road map. You must use logic to impliment effective results. Please feel free to call on me at any time if you have questions, would like further explaination or just need someone to talk to. May God put His arms around each of you, the Holy Angels protect you, and the Holy Spirit guide you in this most important matter. Your brother in Christ, Doc 0 Jan 11, 2006, 9:30 AM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_12_year_old_daughter%2C_need_I_say_more%3F_P12515/?page=unread#12515 Good advice Ellen & Sheila. Keep communicating and pray alot. Be willing to talk about anything, even when you wish to cringe. I think often moms probably do deal with this type of thing better. Dads want to limit and protect and possibly are slightly embarassed. Parenting adolescent girls is not for the faint of heart, thats for sure. What kids know at 12 today some of us didnt know 'til after we were adults & married, if then. I told my kids a few years ago that they can talk to me about anything. I may not like it and i may not agree but they can bring whatever to me and we will talk. Get to know who they are friends with as much as possible. Encourage those you approve of, those you dont becareful what u say cause that often pushes them closer to the ones you dont want them with.(also remember some of these kids you dont like are living in unbearable situations. My daughters friends tell me things from their families that are so sad, its a wonder some of these kids are as good as they are, they need a hug and a prayer too) I have a 17 yr old daughter and a 19 yr old son and im 52. Pure culture shock at times but you must be able to listen and talk. That and prayer are the 2 most important things. They need to know your morals and convictions but they may test the limits. They also talk big for shock value at times, boys in particular do that. The thing i have found is the most important is instead of freaking, going into my prayer closet and praying. Works best if i button my lip and give it to God. The more i nag about something or pry the worse it often gets. The other thing is pray protection on them constantly. Make sure they know you love them no matter what, and so does God. 0 Jan 9, 2006, 8:53 PM http://www.praize.com/forums/People_C21/Parents_F94/Re%3A_12_year_old_daughter%2C_need_I_say_more%3F_P12513/?page=unread#12513 Hey John ! Long time huh ? Listen , if I can make a suggestion it would be that you let your wife speak with your daughter. If you are in fear of pushing your limits then let your wife deal with this issue. As you know I have 2 girls and sometimes dads do want to correct and be stern when a loving hug is all that is needed. If there should be something that concerns your wife then have her bring it to you so that you have time to think and pray before speaking. As we both know confrontation is not always best. Let your daughter know your heart but remember not to let her fear you. If you can have that loving relationship where she feels free to speak she will come to you. First and foremost give it all to God before reacting in the flesh. Amen ! Your friend and Sis, Sheila 0 Jan 9, 2006, 8:01 PM