Okay, I am not a Christian and I don't know anything about Christianity. I'll start by telling you this-I recently had a baby. I was sleeping with a 28 year old man (I'm 21) and he is supposedly a Christian. We are unwed. His parents are also Christian. The man told me he wasn't ready to be a father and will not contact me. He originally told me to have an abortion. He lives with his parents, wouldn't tell them that he was having a child, so I called and told them because I thought they deserved to know. They said they would keep in contact with me but have no interest now. They all want me to give my son up for adoption (I refuse!) and they all want nothing to do with him. My question is this- why are they shunning their grandson? Is there something in the Bible that says if your son makes a mistake and gets someone pregnant, the child doesn't COUNT as your flesh and blood? I'm just trying to understand how someone could deny their own flesh and blood.



Thank you all in advance.

Oh, Jennifer. There is nothing in God's Word about not taking responsibilities. Some people, even Christian, so fear that word and the changes that it does make in one's life. I feel that even while you feel you are not a Christian, I think God is indeed leading you and brought you here to Praize. I haven't been in your situation but do know of those who have. It isn't an easy way to go for you or your child. May you have positive direction in what you are to do in this manner. Don't let others come between you and the joy of having your baby. Will it be easy, probably not. Will it be worth it, by all means. I will be praying for you. Sorry I wasn't great help, just know that the God I know and love, loves His children no matter where they are at. I pray for others to come alongside you, to walk with you in the months ahead, and be there to share the joy when you see your child's face. I will also be praying for the father and his family. Try and be patient. Time will tell if they do actually come around. As a grandma, I cherish my grandchildren and it is difficult when life gets in the way and I'm not able to have the time I'd like with them. All of this is in His hands and He will surely be with you through it all.

Hi Jennifer,



First let me say you and your child will be in my prayers. When I say, "I understand how you feel," it is not ment to be a statement of sympathy. As a father, grandfather and great-grandfather I will tell you that I've had up close and personal experience with the situation you find yourself in right now. I can say this from the perspective of each person involved including your child's.



You have been given some excellent advice. I will also say that God is indeed leading you in your search for answers. It is most unfortunate that the father if your child, who says he's a Christian, is not following the teachings and principals of the Bible.



As you have already been told the road ahead may not be easy for you and the same is true for your child. At this point in time none of us have any magic answers for you but, as a Christian, I know from personal experiance that God does have the answers for both you and your child.



If you need/want someone who understands what you're going through, and understands the ramifications of any decisions that may be made by anyone involved, to talk to, please know that you are free to call on me at anytime. You may reach me directly at thecountrydoc@cox.net. I would welcome your mail.



You are also welcome to ask questions about the biblical/Christian principals involved to help you understand what has/is happening in your life and will happen in the life of your child. I'm also going to add you to my buddies list to remind me and you, that even if you don't write, you and your child are/will be in my prayers.



Your friend and brother in Christ,

Doc



PS: There are never dumb qustions although there may be dumb answers.

Thank you both. You have been a great help to me! I don't think that I've ever even opened a Bible, so I had no idea what it might say on that subject. I guess I was just looking for some reason they would do that, because I can't think of one...



Also, I think I forgot to mention-I already had the baby, his name is Wesley and he is 3 months old! He is so amazing!!!!

Jennifer, I am so happy for the joy that you have in Wesley! What a cute name! Enjoy him. He is a gift.



I am so sorry that Wesley's father and family are behaving so badly. That is NOT Christian behavior, and they are the ones that will lose in the end. I will say that until their attitude changes, you and Wesley are probably better off without them.



I also will be praying for you, and you are welcome to email me with any questions about anything.

Hi once again Jennifer,



You and Wes have been on my mind a great deal today. I would like to share something with you that I hope will keep you looking forward not backward. Wes is depending on you.



Just click this link and enjoy. http://www.inspiringthots[...]arn.php



Your friend and brother in Christ,

Doc

Dear Jennifer,

That is good you kept the baby. I'm sure the father of the baby and his parents want to avoid their own shame and embarrassment over the situation because of what it might do to their reputations. However, God sees everything and what they are doing is wrong. God chastises Christians for doing the wrong thing. No one gets away with anything. They are not strong Christians and may not be true Christians at all but only "nominal Christians."



But God will forgive you and you will have eternal life if you repent and receive him into your heart.



God loves you and cares about you and I believe God was leading you in spite of not being saved.



Open the Bible and read all the words Jesus said (easy to find in red) and you'll find out a lot. This starts in the book of Matthew through John. Also read Revelation 3:20 (last book in the Bible). Jesus knocks on the door of your heart. Trust him and he'll be with you and help you and bless you.



I'll be in prayer for you also.



Marcia

mommy2wes (Jennifer Allen)



How ironic that yourself, claiming to know nothing of what it means to be a ‘Christian’ should have so far done everything possible to ‘know and do the will of God’, yet your irresponsible Christian boy friend and his equally irresponsible parents seem to neither follow nor know the will of their Heavenly Father, which is ‘to love as He has loved us’.



I would like to let you know that the love you have for Wesley and the love he will show to you is all you really need to know about what ‘God’ is really like. Because the Bible says that “God is LOVE and those that do not love, do not know God.



You already seem to know God better than your boyfriend and his parents have demonstrated.



It may be though that his parents are so ashamed of him and his selfish attitude that they cannot face you, that is so sad because they are going to miss so much fun with their Grandson and yourself.



You have been given a wonderful gift. Get to know Wesley and God even better, trust both of them to show you The WAY, and may God’s blessing be with you both.



Don’t give up entirely on your boyfriend if you still trust him sufficiently to be mature enough to be a good father to your child, but don’t be foolish in just accepting him as a husband if he really can’t face what he’s done and the pain he’s caused. I agree in those circumstances that you may be better off without him and his parents.



Regards Chris

Hi Jennifer.

As a grandparent and mom I have come across similiar situation with a family member...and know it was not easy,yet God loves you and your child. In fact after God touched my heart to forgive myself we have bonded with our grandchild. I pray and hope that your situation will change and I will pray to that end.

AS Doc said God does have the answers. Remember you are not alone in this situation. MAY you find support and help in your community and or through a pastor you can trust.

God has a plan for your life not of evil but of hope.Jeremiah 9 :11 I think...
In good times and bad,God never changes