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Mon, Oct 17 2005 - 02:28 PM

Letting Go...

When my Daddy was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease quite a few years ago, he had all ready passed through a time when an early mini-stroke had made him into an irritable old man....like his brothers and father before him, and had, thanks to another mini-stroke, become the lovable, huggable, very funny, and kind fellow he was to the end. I know how very lucky we were to have an Alzheimer’s parent like he was. The week before he died, we were in the ER with him over some gut pain that forever came and went, and he (now without any pain at all of course) took the nurse’s hand, asked her name, and both created and sang a song for her based on her name. She was delighted. What a lovely, smiling, handsome, wonderful fellow was my Daddy...and so soft in his last years....just like hugging a snugly soft teddy...and warm, always warm, especially his hands. He and I were bonded by an appreciation for listening quietly to beautiful music, by a gentle and peaceful attitude...serenity like breathing softly while the snow is falling...... And I let him go....when he needed to go, before it got too late, before he was completely erased, before we could only remember the pain of extreme indignity....we all let him go as quietly as we could, surrounding him with love while shallow breaths drew ultimate serenity upon him..... Let him go, let him go. But I really wanted to keep his soft, warm hands forever with me..... listening...listening in the quiet.
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Name: jeanne53

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About: My husband and I have reared three children without religion, because we are atheists. I sing when I am happy, which is most of the time. My worst vice is collecting books and movies.

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